Stay Calm: Be a thermostat, not a thermometer.

A thermostat sets the temperature in the room, whereas a thermometer reacts to the temperatures in the room.

For Teachers:

Being a thermostat, not a thermometer, means that teachers with this mindset (internal locus of control) lead the emotional vibe in class, ensuring it’s positive and safe for students to do well no matter what is going on. Instead of just copying how students feel, they actively make the class a happy and supportive place. This demonstration actively teaches by showing how to handle feelings, encourage good behavior, help students bounce back from tough times, and make learning safe.

For Parents:

Being a thermostat, not a thermometer, is like being the captain of feelings in your home. Instead of just feeling the same way our children do, parents take control and make sure the home is a safe and happy place. They actively teach by showing how to handle feelings in a healthy way and build strong family bonds.

Reflection Questions

1. What does it look like to be a thermostat? What does it look like to be a thermometer?
2. Am I calm enough to teach the lesson I want to teach?
3. Is my student/child calm enough to learn the lesson I want to teach?
4. Does this lesson need to be taught right now or can it wait until everyone is calmer and I had time to consult and plan?
5. Do certain things trigger me? What are they? How can I plan for those things?
6. Are my basic needs (food/sleep/exercise) met?
7. Are my child’s/student’s basic needs met?
8. What tools can I use to stay calm and regulate the atmosphere instead of react to it?

Tips

• Find someone else who can take over for a few minutes when you feel that you need it.
• Use a script (broken record) to avoid getting bogged down into an emotional argument with children.
• Allow children time to calm down before disciplining them.
• Collect two weeks of data about your habits. This can help you recognize your patterns and make better plans.

References

Landreth, G. L., & Bratton, S. (2005). Child Parent Relationship Therapy (CPRT): a 10-Session filial therapy model.